a fallen short give

Where in the world is he?? I thought to myself around noon.  Abel had taken Matt to the airport at 8:30...he should have been back by now.

At one, Abdian came to the door and explained why her dad and our truck still weren't back.  Abel's sister had been in some kind of a car accident, and he drove way east to find her, took her to a hospital, and now was driving her far back west to a different hospital.

"Ok, Ok, no problem." I told her.  "We'll be praying!"

But as she walked away I found myself thinking dryly, I wonder who will be paying the 75 cents a mile for all of this.  I know exactly who.  WE will.  This ALWAYS happens.  

Not a few minutes later, I found myself bent over Lily and her crazy-haired mermaid Barbie, talking to her yet again about why it is important that she share with Azi. 

Before I even straightened by hypocrite back, the Spirit convicted my heart, squeezing a pain through my chest.

Just a few days earlier, I'd ben studying Luke 6, blessed and convicted by the simplicity of the commands following the Beatitudes.

Love.  Do good.  Bless those who curse.  Turn the other cheek.  Give to everyone who asks of you, and whoever takes away what is yours, do not demand it back.  Treat others the way you want treated.  

Love.  Do good. Lend. Expect nothing in return.  Be merciful.  Do not judge.  Do not condemn.  Pardon.  

Give.  

For his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart.

Four years ago, when we found ourselves 6 months pregnant with no reliable or available transportation, we asked supporters who were already supporting our little family to also consider helping us fund a vehicle.  

What if, upon being asked for help YET again--help that would NEVER personally benefit any of our supporters--our friends had carried the same sentiment that I secretly whined today?  

Ouch. Ouch. OUCH.

My own sin...NOT going what God has asked me to do in Luke 6, pained my heart as I know it pained His.  My thriftiness and wise-spending pushed to the extreme...stinginess.  Stinginess in the face of family crises.  Attitude.  Attitude when all I have received is grace.

After I got the girls down for naps, I was anxious to spend some time with my Father, repent of my silent sin that only He had seen and be made right with Him again.  As I sat with Him, the many ways I have failed just the simple commands in just this passage were made clear to me.  (I truly have nothing to boast aside from Him, or I would never share any of this with you.) 

As always, Oswald nailed it home (even more).  

Never dull your sense of being your utmost for His highest--your best for His glory. 

Many people have turned back because they are afraid to look at things from God's perspective.


Thankful, today, for God's perspective on a "little thing"...a thing that never even left my heart...that was NOT a "little thing" before Him.  

Thankful, today, for the cross and the new life and new day He continues to give me to seek hard after Him, to allow the Spirit to further work on that which fills my heart.  

Thankful for His forgiveness and release.  

Thankful for the opportunity to GIVE and to give Him glory by obeying His command to GIVE.  

Search our hearts, O God, and give us your perspective...

_______________

Follow-Ups: 

ABEL:

When Abel returned around 5 pm, he shared that his sister's tap tap (public transportation) had been going around sharp bend far too fast and plummeted over the side of the mountain.  The truck had been overflowing with people, two died on site, and several more were never expected to reach the hospital.  

His sister is still unable to speak, and has suffered a major head injury.  She is still in the hospital in town, along with several other people whom Abel was able to take, thanks to the truck.  There's no calling "911."  As he handed me the keys, eyes numb, he assured me that he had washed all of the blood out of the truck before returning.

Please be in prayer for Abel's sister and others who suffered this trauma.

MATT:

After a several delayed flight out of Haiti, Matt missed his connecting flight, had to buy yet another ticket to a different final destination with a different airline, etc, in order to get to New Jersey in time for church serviced in the morning.  THANK YOU, Uncle Don, for driving all the way to New York at 10 PM to get him, and thank you, all, for your prayers as he continues to travel and preaches tomorrow morning.