graciousness

 Well, they're just plain special family.  

Sometimes life is really hard.  And then sometimes, God sneaks in some unmerited, unexpected graciousness and it blesses your socks off and humbles you profoundly...and that's Dodo and Bubba.

Having them love the girls and the girls love them (Sofie's been asking for "Dodo's Houshe" all day) is just the icing on the cake.  Or the penny for the pound.

They look really happy...but they were sad to see us go, I'm sure :)  It takes a few days for the house to stop ringing after a week with the Ayars :)

We love you both and are so thankful for gracious YOU in our lives, friends we can just be family with, and you love us anyway.

This is as close as we got to Niagra Falls....we only had 30 minutes of cushion to get to our missions dinner in New Bedford!  

 New Bedford Presbyterian Church has ALWAYS been God's graciousness to us, from the first moment they found us.  I have no idea why this special group of people in PA love us like they do, but they do.  We've never done a thing for them and they found us through the newspaper, but they PRAY for us, they follow us, they send us boxes, they love on our kids, they stay in touch, and they always spoil us when we're there!

 This year was no exception...the girls thought it was Christmas :)

We had an awesome dinner overlooking the whole county, and then all had a great time catching up, playing, worrying about Debi's need to arrange all the doll clothes in perfect piles.

The girls loved to hear stories about past visits with our New Bedford family, from before they were born to when I was pregnant, when they were newborns 'till now.

Jean and Ted's house was such a gorgeous backdrop to such a fun evening!

This is the New Bedford missions committee, some of whom have been on the committee longer than they can remember!

We're so blessed to have this special family in our lives.  When they tell you they love you and that they'll be praying, they've proved it. 

 Unmerited, unexpected graciousness that blesses our socks off and humbles us, that's Aunt Lori, June, Judi, Debi....That's New Bedford!  Thank you, friends!  We thank our God for you...

This afternoon we safely made it back to Columbus, Ohio, just in time to speak and preach at Livingston UMC tomorrow morning...hope to see you there!

no ounce of odd.

Would you believe that it’s actually become much more of a cultural stretch for me to go from Haiti to the States than to go from the States to Haiti?  I’m realizing it anew today.

We’ve worked hard these years: worked hard to understand, worked hard to dress and eat and  work and play like Haiti, worked hard to embrace the culture, worked hard to speak the language.  To know Haiti inside and out. 

We have gone about for years now like children, asking, “Why? Why?” Learning.  Stretching.  Growing up, again, but this time Haitian.

So I guess it makes sence that somewhere along the way, it’s become less and less work--more and more normal. 

No, I will never be Haitian.  But I realize when suddenly immersed in scores of Americans that I’ve changed far more than I realize.  After 6 years, it feels like I hardly know how to be an American in America.  After four years, I hardly know how to be alone without 2 girls.  Between the two, I hardly know what to do with myself!

For the first time in 6 months, I do NOT stick out as foreigner today, but I promise you I haven’t felt so bizarre and strange since July.  Things happen so fast here!

Sarah’s jeans, though loose, feel like they’re indecently outlining the fact that I have legs.  My formal English feels heavy in my mouth.  I’m trying to figure out how many gourdes $11 US is, instead of figuring out how many dollars 500 gourdes is.  No one is looking at me.  No one.  And instead of feeling relief, I feel isolated. 

I haven’t moved more than 30 mph in 6 months.  Just the zip from one airport to another in Port-au-Prince had me clutching the car door.  The guy at the coffee counter asked from my accent if I was from Cap-Haitien.  People around me are talking about…well, weird things J  Things Haitians don’t talk about.  Just as Haitians talk about things Americans don’t talk about.  (Which pretty much means there’s nothing I don’t talk about J )

I’m texting with Junior at the same time, Junior who always struggles the same as I do. Fully Haitian.  But raised largely by Americans.  Now, no one understands him.  He’s too complicated for his own good, and feels always odd…always out of place…always missing someone.

It makes me realize how complicated we all are.  Everyone around me.  You.

As I sit in Port-au-Prince, waiting to fly to Miami, half the people around me look like me, and the other half are huddled in coats and sweatshirts, like me.  All the people around me talk one of my languages.  I get both cultures.  I understand where everyone is coming from…and yet where NO ONE is coming from all at the same time.

What grace we can give each other, knowing what deep wells we each are.  How far past our appearances we go.  Even our languages.

For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? (1 Cor. 2:13)

And yet then there’s God.  Praise the Lord.  God among us.  But not like us.

God, who meets me in that weird place.  White skin.  American clothes.  Haitian casual.  Mourning heart.  Missing my children arms.  Hating to miss the Christmas party talent show this afternoon.  Anxious to be with my father.

He’s been in every one of my experiences.  Knows every crevice of my spirit.  Knows where I struggle, knows where I rejoice.  There He has been, there He is, and here I am--fully revealed, fully known, fully me before Him. 

No ounce of odd.  No ounce of American or Haitian or black or white or English or Creole or otherwise.  No ounce of out of place.  No ounce of misunderstood.  

In Him, I am.

What a beautiful truth.  What a beautiful place to dwell, wherever our feet are.

Whom have I in heaven but You?

And besides You, I desire nothing on earth.

My flesh and my heart may fail,

But God is the strength of my heart

And my portion forever.

The nearness of God is my good;

I have made the Lord God my refuge,

That I may tell of all Your works.

Psalm 73:25-28

on the road again

This last two weeks has been a whirlwind!  Between finals and the end of the school year events, EBS board meetings, closing up the books, graduation, grading and getting ready to head to Ohio, it has been CRAZY!  Here's a few random photos from the last days...

Second year, celebrating their soccer victory

 Church on Sunday at Vilmers, and student Mogene singing with his group.

We stopped at the main OMS campus on our way to taking the board to the beach Tuesday and got these great shot of all kinds of friends...LtoR Jeff E., Rick and Carol F., Sam and Cam and kiddos, Jane and Bud D., Harold B. and Bill and Diana V., with Galen and Linda A. taking the picture.  It was such a fun day!

Then we spent Wednesday in meetings and hanging out with Gertha and baby Thaliya, who is just SUCH a cutie (I think you've heard that a few times now, but oh man!)

This week has been full of lots of ups and downs, but Wednesday was heartbreaking...EBS's night watchman and friend Augustin died in the morning at the hospital in Cap-Haitien.  He was Linda's uncle, and one of the people we had prayed with last time we went to pray with Linda because he'd been having some stomach cramping.  

Just a few days ago he came to see us and shared he was finally doing better...then Wednesday morning we heard early that he had taken a turn for the worse the day before and was in the hospital...

Then Roselor, who is related to Augustin in a very complicated fashion, ran into my office bawling around 10 that he had just died in the hospital.

It was the 4th death in Saccanville in the last 10 days, and the spirit of the village is very discouraged, confused and sad.  We're still just shocked to have lost such a great man...and so quickly.

Life is so full of ups and downs...so thankful for His faithfulness and for several good ministry opportunities the last days have therefore held.

We head for Ohio tomorrow morning and hope to get in by 11 pm...Then Matt heads for England on the 16th...to start his doctorate at the University of Chester!  (more on that Saturday!)

Ah, what a busy week...month...uh, year :) Thanks for your prayers while leave home and while we travel!

comin' your way...

These next months are shaping up to be busy ones!  There's a good chance we're going to be in your corner of the world this summer, and if so, we would LOVE to see you.  

This is from our first speaking days, when we shared our "predestination" for Haiti :)  As kids, Matt was always dirty, and I was always cold!

Here's a list of where we'll be sharing pictures, stories and the Gospel formally this summer...Click on any date/place to be directed to the web-site, where you can find times, directions, etc.

APRIL 28     Matt graduates from WBS      Jackson, Mississippi

MAY 3-7      EBS Board Meetings      EBS, Haiti

MAY 6      EBS Graduation      EBS, Haiti

MAY 14 - JUNE 7      Matt: Nottingham, England      Stacey, Lily and Sofia: Columbus, OH    (what???  update on this soon!)

JUNE 10      New Bedford Presbyterian Church      New Bedford, PA

JUNE 17     Livingston UMC     Columbus, OH

JUNE 24     NorthRidge Church      Sabetha, KS

JULY 7-8     Cornerstone Church     Bear, DE

JULY 11     Seeds of Greatness Church     New Castle, DE

JULY 15      Sharptown UMC      Pilesgrove, NJ

JULY 21-22      Bethel      Franklin Mills, PA

JULY 25      Eaton Rapids Camp      Eaton Rapids, MI

***We're also looking at a possible Canada run, so for our Maple Leaf family, stay tuned!

We're leaving our Haiti Home this summer to try to get as close to you as possible!  Even if one of these churches is not your home church, we'd LOVE to have you drive a ways and come hear and see a bit about life and ministry in Haiti, and we'd LOVE some time to catch up with you!  

You are more than welcome to join us at any event, or jot us an email and see if we can catch up with you some other time/place.  

Check out the EBS blog for some great pix from this past ministry weekend.   

great news and travel prayers

We had a really great day today...lots of laundry, cleaning, unpacking and re-packing, but also some great time with friends in Saccanville and in Vaudreil. 


Lily and I walked down the road to a friend's house and while I enjoyed catching up with friends, she enjoyed running like crazy with a few other little ones, eating up Kerline's rice and beans and putting on Shayla's make-up.  Then tonight we had coffee and fantastic cookies at Bud and Cindy's with the other four missionaries here right now (several are in Port and many still in the States).


We are thrilled (understatement) to share with you that some good friends of ours, Sam and Cammie, have just been accepted to come work with us here at Emmaus!  They have lived in Haiti before, have three little kids, and have a heart for Biblical training and being a part of people growing in Christ.  Sam is also a plumber/electrician/fixer-person (how's that for Stacey's description of a profession) and Cam is an evangelist if I've ever met one.


They are funding now and hope to join us after our crazy month (March) of visiting professors.  Ah, the thought of having help with the maintenance-side of things and having someone else living here with us full-time is just divine!  


You can check out their blog here.  If you are interested in helping get them here, you can find out how on their blog.  Please be praying for them as they fund and prepare for this big transition!


Meanwhile, we head for Ohio tomorrow, and would so love your prayers for safe travel and for fantastic behavior from our 2LOs (two little ones).  Please pray for cantankerous Sofia to just be miraculously content...or miraculously sleepy.  One of us is very excited about icy weather, one of us is very excited about icy cream, both of us are very excited about seeing lots of family and about medical appointments (starting on the 29th) to get to the bottom of Matt's health issues.


Thanks for your prayers!  We have truly felt and seen His presence so closely these past weeks, and are so grateful!

one of the reasons

insane.  That is the word to describe both our experience getting out of Haiti three weeks ago and coming home yesterday and today.  Our Haitian flight that was changed from Wednesday to Saturday notified us Friday night that they would not be flying Saturday, but to "try again" Wednesday.  Needless to say when we arrived in Fort Lauderdale at 10 pm (after several delays and de-icings), we were ready to come home!  So, another change in plans, we flew a more major airline into Port-au-Prince instead, got a taxi, changed airports, and got a tiny little plane to finally bring us home.

Though it was rough, we left home in Ohio at 3:30 yesterday and arrived home here today at 2 pm, so 24 hours is not bad in our experience :)  We only slept 4.5 of those hours, but we are home!

And how GOOD it is.  Abel and Maxi were waiting on the runway, and had been since 9 am, anxious to have us safely home.  It was GREAT to see these two true friends and GREAT to be back to our lovely Haiti weather!  As soon as we got in the door, Abel's family had a big "welcome home" lunch planned, so we walked over to his place, visiting with lots of friends along the way who were as thrilled that we were home as we were.  (It's such a good feeling to have people be genuinely happy to see you, isn't it!)

"A small lunch at my house" was Abel's understatement of the century, as they welcomed us home with heaps of gratinay (a macaroni dish), fried chicken, fried plantain, onions, peppers, tomatoes, homemade juice, and even a store bought cake!  Every time I ate something, Abel would immediately motion to his wife to replace whatever I had just eaten on my plate....so...the meal was never ending and we were STUFFED and sent home with plates of food.

After a small speech about his family's excitement for our return and good wishes for the New Year, he also gifted us with a large bottle of champagne, because they know Matt and I "don't drink."  (In Haiti, beer and wine are not considered 'alcohol'...but just the harder stuff like whiskey and rum).  We have been unable to ever communicate that there IS still alcohol in these drinks and therefore we still don't drink them...but Matt and I shared a good laugh as Abel handed a pregnant woman a large bottle of alcohol :)  Now, we have something to re-gift :)

Lily had a blast, we had a blast, and that continued tonight as we ate with John and Dorothy (Dodo and Bubba) and were able to catch up with them...what good friends they have become, and friends that all three of us genuinely missed.  

Something wonderful about Haiti that we always try to explain to people but that can't really be captured is just these things: relationships.  That's what it's all about.

Abel and Maxi were thrilled to wait in the blazing sun at the awful airport ALL day LONG because today wasn't about accomplishing a hundred things for them or about their free time...it was about their relationship with us.

Abel's family purchased loads of food and cooked all day yesterday and today for our lunch today, and it wasn't about the precious money, or the time it all took....it was about their relationship with us.

Neighbors left their homes to welcome us back, share their prayers with us and to celebrate our relationship with them...leaving their privacy and whatever else they were doing just to love and be loved.

John and Dorothy, ever becoming more and more our Haitian neighbors, joyfully did the same thing, sacrificing their food and time and a quite evening to themselves for us because our friendship was of the utmost importance.

Today, at Abel's table laughing together about the last three weeks, it wasn't the poverty or the politics or the state of Haiti that mattered.  It was US that mattered to them, and them to us...

The relationship-orientation of this culture makes it SO MUCH EASIER, in my opinion, to introduce the Father.  Sacrificial love?  We see it EVERY day.  Laying down your life for your friend?  Being in constant contact with your Father?  Being fully relied on someone other than yourself?  Loving your brother more than yourself?  Trusting?  All these issues that are sometimes so foreign in our home culture are so commonly practiced here that introducing the idea that the Father wants to be in relationship with US is almost just common sense!

Just another one of those reasons that we don't like saying that we are "missionaries to Haiti."  This is just where He led us to live, and to be transformed people.  Just another one of those reasons that it is GOOD to be home!

Add on the pile of Christmas cards from many of you and a few care packages, all sent in November and just arrived...we are So thankful tonight for our global family.

on our way home...

Our flight into Haiti tomorrow seems to be good to go, and we are just waiting!  The big January 16th presidential runoff vote has now been delayed until further notice, though our constitution says we must have a new president in office by February 7th.

We were disappointed to hear this as that tension, disappointment, unrest, uneasiness and concern continues to prevail while votes, meetings and announcements continue.  The relative quiet that Haiti has been experiencing these last days isn't the same as PEACE....everyone is anxious to have this settled, to have it settled WELL, and to be able to move on as a country...

Now is a good time to get back in while things are calm and before whatever unfolds with Haiti's new leadership.  You can read more here.

With the one year anniversary of the earthquake quickly approaching, trust us, it is not just America that is dismayed over Haiti's very few obvious advancements and changes since last January.  As Haiti pops in and out of the news these next few days and reports of the earthquake and the current state of Haiti are shared, we ask that we each follow every report with a few moments of prayer for Our brothers and sisters in Haiti.

Many of our beloved (by Him and by us) students continue to have mothers, sisters, siblings and friends living among the rubble in Port-au-Prince.  Keep the plight personal.  The people we're all seeing in the news are Jean Marie's family.  Berthil.  Simeon.  Jean-Marc.  Nicole.  Gesner.  Leandre.  Junior.  Alex.  Freny.  Their families.

We are ALL His Creation, but if you are one of His Children, know that many of those you are seeing in the news are His Children, too...please be praying for Haiti one person at a time, and don't be dismayed (as we're fighting not to be) by "how things are in Haiti."  Pray instead just that He would continue to work...
...and we're excited to get back tomorrow and have lots of new stories of exactly that for you!

Thank you for all your wonderful prayers and emails...we've been overjoyed and so encouraged to hear from many of you these past weeks!

Just in Him.

We’re packed and were ready to go this afternoon to Florida…but called the Haitian airline this morning just to check, and discovered that our flight tomorrow morning has been cancelled due to “technical difficulties.”  After our more-than-nerve-wracking trip out  of Haiti a few weeks ago, we’re not going to mess with any technical difficulties this time J

Thanks to Southwest, our flights to Florida are now changed (for free!) to Friday, and then we hope to fly back into Haiti without problem on Saturday. 

Nonetheless, it’s time to get home:  Matt is chompin’ at the bit to get back to work, Lily is asking incessantly for Jacob, Josephine and Maxi, and though we have stayed some wonderful places with some of our favorite people, I am ready to get back to OUR place and our neighbors and friends and students. 

My doctor cleared us yesterday to go, noting again how “crazy” it was that our “Sophie Scare” was now nothing at all and scheduled an appointment in May right at 36 weeks.  

We were finally able to get through to Abel today and talking with him for a bit had us both homesick, something we frankly didn't expect after such a difficult last several months in Haiti.  The longer we are "bi-culture" the more true it is that things don't seem that different WHEREVER we are.  

If you're talking about food and weather and language, sure, big differences.  But when you're thinking about the real things...the real problems, the real joys, the things that really matter, America isn't all that different from our Haitian home.  We as people are mostly all about ourselves: what we want, what's good for us, how things can be better for US.  Money and things are driving factors in much of what we do and live and how we treat people.  Government has a lot to do with what is profitable or power building, church has a lot to do with how it looks, and it seems that most people everywhere are just getting up every day to survive.

The only people we have met in ANY culture that have truly inspired us are those seeking hard after the Lord and seeking to lead selfless, Christ-centered lives.  The only true joy and contentment that we have ever seen captured anywhere has been in Him.  The only truth we're ready to plant our feet on in any language, government or way of life is The Truth.  

And the only hope any of us have...from the man in the mouse at Chuckie Cheese...my sister's angry, vulgar, abusive and drug-addicted neighbors...the smiling strangers at a new church this past Sunday who not-a-one greeted us...to the destitute and lame widow living down the road from us...the men and women at Emmuas Biblical Seminary...the witchdoctors worn out by dedications of the new year to Satan...the only hope any of us have is just in Him.  

Just in Him.  

Praise the Lord we're just in Him.  And that He tells us we don't HAVE to be of this world, just in Him.  That we don't have to be slaves to ourselves or to sin...just in Him.  That we don't have to be OF our cultures, don't have to be slave nor free, Greek nor Jew, American nor Haitian, but just in Him.

In many senses, we find ourselves once again on the move, trying to get to the States, and now trying to get back to Haiti, trying to plan everything, see everyone, do everything, get ready for another semester.  

But in a very real and different sense, we're hanging out where we've been for years now with NO plan to budge and no broken airplanes making any difference...

Just in Him.

G R A D U A T I O N 2 0 1 0 !

After a long day of airports and airplanes, we are safely home, well fed on Root Beer floats and Bob Evans, and enjoying the little things we have missed from home and our home culture...air-conditioning, Meijers, smooth roads, jeans! For Lily, Ohio is like an entirely foreign world, and she is just mesmerized with carpeting, string cheese, and the family cat.

Graduation was fantastic! Everything went so smoothly

I was laughing SO hard in this picture...One of the cooks, Mona, was taking the picture, and it was the first picture she had ever taken in her life. She was SO excited, and wanted it to look just perfect, and was critiquing and rearranging everyone's hair, dress, smile...

A church choir from Vaudreil came and sang a few special songs...

...second year student Civil "Artist" gave a performance,...

and then seminary choir just brought the house down...they were FANTASTIC!

Though the Haitian culture differs in many ways from American culture, I'm PRETTY sure I have a picture JUST like this of someone texting from my sister's college graduation :)

Saying Good-bye was hard for Gertha and us, even if only for a few weeks.
Matt translating for Dr. Bill Cooper, who gave a short speech about the last years of EBS and about the hope Haiti has today.
Several students were recognized and given class "appointments".

The valedictorian, Loubens Joseph, gave a speech as well, bringing the ceremony to a little over three hours...whew! We praise the Lord for this awesome celebration and ending of a school year where His presence and leading was so magnificent.

You can see more pictures at the Seminary blog.