whole heart

Fostering, man. It is by far the hardest thing we've ever done.

And that's got nothing to do with the kiddos...even seven...and everything to do with trusting them all, truly, entirely, to Him. With any of my kiddos, I cannot control every situation. But when all my mama bear everything is coming out, and yet I can do NOTHING, it leaves me totally unglued, or totally forced to TRUST Him. 

Graced to trust Him. 

It has been one of those weeks, and I'm trying to step into these days fighting the battles I can, and trusting Him, FULLY, with their hearts and minds and lives and all the many places I cannot. 

Being a mama is beautiful hard. But being one with no voice or rights is brutal.

If you know a foster mama this weekend, friend, write her a short note or give her a hug and a pint of Ben and Jerry's or tell her God's got this.

How God has used this journey the past 2.5 years to stretch me in Him! Am I really protecting any of my children? Or has it always been Him?  Am I the one really providing? Or is it Him?  Do I have anything of value to invest in any of them? Or is it just HIM?

It's just Him. I put my whole heart into everything I do for these 8 precious humans. But my whole heart is just full of Him, AND in His hands. 

I'm so thankful in the end, it's NOT all boiling down to or all counting on me. 

Will you be praying for our bonus loves extra these days?

This week was award ceremonies, getting ready for final exams, the last of the baseball tournaments, dear Henry's funeral, Bible study, bake sales, starting to wrap up some homeschool subjects and a really fantastic sermon Sunday at church (sermon starts around 38 minutes, if you're looking to be re-inspired by Our First Love!). 

Grateful for you.