09 April 2016

that woman

Oh man.

Matt made it safely to Miami, and then today to New Jersey...and the snow! Tomorrow he preaches both services at Sharptown, and then heads into "Salvation 101" tomorrow night!  Pray for him and this time with us if you would!

We made it through most of our day, when after dinner, while Phil, Leme, Jodenel, Haylie, Andrew and I were talking around the table. Sofie fed Nora an ice cube.

It only took a few seconds for her to go from happy to coughing to lips turning blue...scared me to death.  As soon as she started choking, our sensitive-hearted Sofie lost it and went running outside wailing, and by the time we got Nora to cough up the ice cube and breathing again, all three girls were bawling (of course) for Daddy.

Not the best start to a long week alone.

But today was a new day, and though it started at a horrific hour (at what age do children get that Saturday means NOT 5:30 AM?) and though there were visitors at the door before 7 (I make NO apologies for my appearance if you come before 7  and my second cup of coffee) we made it through a sweet uneventful morning of crepes and crafts and homeschool, and then the girls played outside while Nora napped and I Romans-ed.
our lunch picnic in the tree house
Which reminded me wholeheartedly that I am far too weak a woman to parent, to marriage, to housekeep, to friend, to hope, to live without His Word, without His strength.  That hour with Romans and the Lord gave me all the rest, all the strength, all the patience, all the restored joy I could ask for.

A babysitter, chocolate, Matt being here, a foot massage, take out Chinese, an hour of Downton Abbey, sleeping in, a phone call with a friend, a dishwasher, a gallon of Ben and Jerry's (yes, I said gallon)...any of that would have been AWESOME today.  But Christ Himself is truly the only thing that satisfies ongoing.  Truly the only thing that feeds.  Truly the only thing that changes my heart and prayers.  The only thing I truly needed today.

Today, it was Romans, especially Romans 4.  Talking about Abraham, verse 20 says this:

With respect to the promise of God, 
he did not waver in unbelief
but grew strong in faith,
giving glory to God
and being fully assured that what God had promised
He was also able to perform.
It was credited to him as righteousness.


Abraham believed God was who He said He was.  He believed God could do what He said He would do.  Abraham trusted, fully, that God would be God.  

So he didn't waver.  Wasn't tossed by every wave of the sea.  Wasn't run over by every cruddy day or dismal outcome, wasn't swayed by those around him or ruffled by his circumstances.

He didn't waver, but he grew strong. His faith grew, fear and self-centeredness  and pride fled, and his faith in God's power made him strong.

And by that he gave glory to God.  God was glorified in Abraham's life as his full dependent, was glorified through other's perspective of a "father of faith" like Abe.

He was fully assured that God could do what He said He could and would do.  Was Abraham fully certain that God would do everything he wanted? Not by a long shot.  Was he confident that he was going to get his way? Was he sure that everything he wanted was going to happen?

Nope.  

He was fully assured that God was going to get God's way...and THAT was all Abraham needed to know.

MAN, I want to be that woman!!  I want to BE tired and BE awoken at 5:30 and BE alone and HAVE bawling babies on my hips and not. waver.   I want to BE unshowered and BE teaching multiplication tables and SIT with Belony sayin' I look tired and grow. strong.  I want to be imperfect and be unsuccessful and be poor and be broken be a poured out living sacrifice and give. glory. to God.

I want to live each day...the awesome ministry days and the unproductive monotony days...being fully assured that what God has promised, He is able to perform.

I want my life and how I live it to be overwhelmingly abundantly proof that God's GOT this, and that every fiber of my heart and mind and soul are in Him.   

God's Word : making another day victorious in the place He cares about the very most...the heart.   

2 comments:

  1. Thank you for writing this. I'm glad that Nora ended up being ok. This is what I needed today.

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  2. Oh my gosh those choking moments feel like a lifetime of scary. So so glad she is ok.

    Loved this Stace, thank you.

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