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02 October 2012

put on prayer.

It all started because of the dress-code.

If you've ever visited the OMS Haiti field, you know what I'm talking about about.  No pants for women, ever.  No shorts.  Shirts must have sleeves, always.  Tattoos must be covered, no bikinis at the beach...the list gets pretty extensive.  


It's not so bad, once you get used to it.  To this day when Lily sees me stateside in jeans, she asks why I'm wearing "Poppy Pants."  


But, as you can imagine, teams aren't usually all that thrilled about doing construction projects in skirts, and when it's over 100 degrees all day, wearing a tank top sure sounds heavenly.  


So, every few years, as times change and dress seems to shift, inevitably it comes up at some missionary meeting that perhaps the code could, too.


Most recently, I've seen a lot more pastor's wives and women who are strongly professing their faith wearing thick strapped tank tops...not at church, heavens.  And no way at work.  But in their home, out in town, when shopping, cooking, ok.


But, before we vote to make a change (which would basically entail cutting sleeves off a few weekend shirts, since none of us really own any :), we all agreed it would be best to consult a few Christian Haitian leaders, recognizing that foreigners are watched rather closely, and desiring to be above reproach in a culture we are all seeking to represent Christ in.  


Matt was put on the "fact-finding committee" (you know the church...gotta have a committee for everything!) and so on his way to a F-O-U-R hour service Sunday (is it wrong to be semi-thankful the girls were spotty?), spoke to several of our student leaders about dress in Haiti.


He returned visibly disturbed.  (If YOU don't want to be, I'd stop reading here.)


Sometimes asking questions gets you answers that you can't live with.


Do you know how much it costs to hire a prostitute in Saccanville (where we live)?  

10 gourdes.  That. Is. 24. CENTS.  

Do you know how desperate this means people are?  


Do we know, I mean, really, what motivates someone to do this for 24 cents?


Do you know how many women and children (shudder) are in?  


The student's guess after living in Saccanville for 3-4 years was 50% or more of the women and young girls in Saccanville. 


We've been told for years that "Discos"--these little night club shacks set up along the road that blare loud party music when enough money has been assembled to run a generator--are "not for Christians.  Ever." 


What we didn't realize until Matt's fact-finding mission was that this is because they are brothels.  The men who go are looking, the women who go are selling, and the discos have bunks in the back.  


All of them?  I mean, there are 30 "Discos" between here and OMS Haiti's campus (6 miles from here).  


All of them.


And do you know how people know which 50% of women in Saccanville are available?  Because they're wearing pants.  And skinny-strapped shirts.  


"Wearing pants does NOT mean you are absolutely a prostitute," one student shared, and the others agreed.  "But it absolutely means you are not a Christian."


No question?  No question.


"It (prostitution) is," they told Matt, "what  everyone who does not know Jesus does.  You know how people are always telling us that they can't become Christians because of their lives?"


(Almost EVERYONE I tell about the Gospel says this. I always thought this just meant they were either witch-doctors profiting from the position, or sold cigarettes or lottery tickets or some cultural thing understood as something only non-Christians do.)


"It's because they're either constantly using prostitutes, or constantly using prostitution to buy food, provide for their families, send their kids to school.  They don't want to become Christians because they know they would need to change, and they are afraid of what that change would do to their income."


I felt sick as Matt shared this with me, thinking back to a young girl Belony and I used to disciple every week almost 2 years ago.


He was always harping on her about wearing different clothes, and it drove me crazy.  He was always sharing with her that she needed to dress differently, and I always thought we were talking about DRESS.  Something I've never believed God cared about.  I was always telling him to leave her alone and let her wear what she wanted...she could still follow Jesus wearing jeans!


But I realized as Matt shared the conversation with me that what Belony was telling her, and what she knew and he knew and everyone knew (except the naive foreigner) was to STOP prostituting herself.  To STOP letting her uncle sell her out for the price of her living in his home.  To STOP agreeing to provide for herself like that, and to trust the Lord to provide for her in a different way.


For years I have been frustrated that pastors often refuse to baptize people until they have jumped through a series of hoops...come through some growth process...weeks of Bible study...serious commitment and change and fruit in their lives (and again, sometimes dress being brought into the equation).   


And while there may well still be cases that I SHOULD be frustrated about, this new information makes me realize that some shepherds have been hesitant to baptize men and women who continue to be actively and willingly involved in prostitution, unwilling to leave prostitution or stop providing women for prostitution because of the financial gain.


And then of course, there is the question of "willing".  


Ah, my heart.  How many women and children, just in Saccanville alone, are "willing" because they have four starving children at home?  Are "willing" because their parents or care-givers are forcing them to contribute to the families desperate needs?  Are "willing" because they can't stand to see their kids grow up with NO education like they did, and are "willing" to, this year, send them to school no matter what.  Are "willing" because it is what everyone does...an easy way to make ends meet?

I mean, how did I really think AIDS is so common here?  Why did I really think there are so many 13 year old moms walking past the Seminary?   



What can I do?


I see now--when I've wondered myself why I can't wear pants, maybe just sometimes, when I've judged Christian leaders for their stands, when I've thought to myself, "Well, I'm sure they'll find a way to make ends meet"-- that I had NO IDEA what I was talking about.


I probably still don't.


What can I do?


I want to walk up and down the streets and give quarters to every woman and child I see.  Every single day forever.  


I want to take every young girl and lock her onto the Seminary and love her and feed her and teach her and protect her.


I want the Lord to end it...How does He stand it?  How does He see all the dark corners of all the dark villages of all the dark countries of the world and..and...STAND IT.  


How have I lived 30 years and not realized it?  And what do I do, now I have?



I know, anew, that life without Christ is the same as eternity without Christ--HELL.  


I know, anew, that there is a lot of extreme, absurd, ridiculous Christianity to be lived (by us EACH, wherever we are) if there will be a change in the world.


I know, anew, that the freedom for which He died for me is a freedom the world is in desperate need for.  That the love with which He died for me is a love desperately needed.


I know, anew, that I will not look at her the same, tomorrow, when I pass her on the street.  That my new knowledge that I DO NOT UNDERSTAND will  flower as grace, as compassion.  That my constant harping on RELATIONSHIP, not preaching and leaving, must apply to her, too...must apply to more.


I know, anew, that what stemmed from sleeves now means I'll never be the same.


When you pull on whatever you pull on in the morning...pray for our little village and the world, will you?



“Compassion is hard because it requires the inner disposition to go with others to the place where they are weak, vulnerable, lonely, and broken. But this is not our spontaneous response to suffering. What we desire most is to do away with suffering by fleeing from it or finding a quick cure for it.”  -Henri Nouwen 














1 comment:

  1. Yikes! That is disturbing!! I always wondered why it mattered SO MUCH to not wear jeans or pants in other cultures for women! Now I know...at least for the Haitian culture. How sad and heartbreaking that is on so many levels! Praying.

    ReplyDelete