found by you

Coming back to Haiti this year, I was committed to get that good, daily (EVERY day) time with the Lord that I NEED (and want!) no matter WHAT.  I knew what I needed to do.

It has meant using my most productive, most uninterrupted, most peaceful time.  Every day after lunch at 12:30, Sofie and Lily go down for their naps.  Because the sun is hot and high and because, well, a LOT of people go down for their naps after the big noon meal of the day, we almost NEVER have visitors at this time.  Gertha and Noel are long gone, Matt's back to the office...

This used to be my GO time.  I would go crazy, cleaning up from the morning, finishing work I hadn't been able to accomplish in my three short office hours, making dinner and bread for the evening, washing dishes, hanging out laundry, catching up on emails...I could get SO much DONE.

But I committed to give whatever it took to have that good time with the Lord, and so the moment I get them down, before I touch ANYTHING, I  (some days literally FORCED myself to) sit at my desk, pull out my Bible, journal, "Utmost for His Highest" and dig in.

And (no surprises here) it has been SO good.  And the house might be messier.  And tonight's crock pot meal got going WAY too late and instead of still-hard beans and undercooked beef for supper, we were forced to have pancakes and eggs...and now that it's 8:30 pm and Matt, Lily and Sofie are all in bed, our intended dinner is ready to eat.  

BUT it's been good, and (again, no surprises) He's been faithful to meet me as I've tried so hard to meet Him.

Have a second?  Because today the Lord in Jeremiah touched the heart in Stacey.

You know the very famous verse in Jeremiah 29:11 that says, "For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity, to give you a future and a hope" ?  

Do you know what verse 10 says?

I didn't.  It says, "Thus says the Lord: When seventy years (70!) have been completed, I will fulfill My good word to you, and bring you back to this place.  For I know the plans I have..."

I know the plans I have for you, to give you a hope and a future...in SEVENTY years.  I'm SO darn impatient.  I don't have to sit but a few days in discomfort, confusion or frustration before I throw up my hands to Him in an "I've had all I can take" prayer.  "For heavens sakes, settle this, Lord."

His time is just NOT our time, and for the thousandth time we're reminded in verse 13 that it's not about events being accomplished or tasks being completed, but about BEING in Him.

"You will seek Me and FIND me when you search for ME with all your heart.  When you search for Me with all your heart, I will be found by you," declares the Lord.

No, "you will find your answer"...just, "You will find The Answer."  No, "you will find your way"...just, "You will find The Way.  

When we finally stop our running and thinking and trying and straining and seek Him, search for Him with ALL our hearts, He will be found.  He has promised it.  He will make Himself found.  

And just another chapter later, for the first time I saw this huge promise of deliverance from captivity for the Israelite people that is ALSO this HUGE promise of deliverance from captivity for US.  For Haiti.  For where you are.  For ME.

30:12--"For thus says the Lord, your wound is incurable.  Your injury, serious.  There is NO one to plead your cause; there is no healing for your sore, no recovery for you.  All your lovers have forgotten you, they do not seek you;  Your iniquity is great and your sins are numerous.  Why even cry out over your injury?  Your pain is incurable."

Man, do I see it.  Yes, I see it around me...the incurable wound in a village full of darkness in a country full of darkness, where men are burned alive in tires because of hatred and revenge and little girls live unspeakable lives for a plate of rice.  There is no recovery.  No healing.  No hope in the lovers of the world.  

And yes, I see it in America.  The more we saw and heard politics and its problems, the more we watched of the killings in Colorado, the more we saw the evening news..."Your injury, serious."  The things America has given everything for, forgotten her.  

But most, I feel it in me.  There is just plain NOTHIN' I can do to redeem myself.  This bent towards self in me...serious.  No cure that can be found in this world.  No healing for my numerous sin in my husband, friends, family, resources, activities, children.

It's ugly.  Our situation by ourselves.  With no hope. 

Outside of Him.

"But I will restore you to health, and I will heal you of your wounds,' declares the Lord.  'You shall be my people, and I will be your God...
At that time, the people who survived the sword found GRACE in the wilderness.  I have loved you with an everlasting love; 
Therefore I have drawn you in with lovingkindness.  
I will build you and you will be rebuilt, and with weeping they will come, and by supplication I will lead them; I will make them walk by steams of waters, on a straight path in which they will not stumble. 
And my people will be satisfied with My goodness.  
There is hope for your future."  (Jeremiah 30:17-31:17)

Isn't THAT the promise of the century?  Of TIME? 

That incurable rot of sin in us doesn't have to be our future, doesn't have to be our life.  There is no healing for that, no fixing it...but in Him.  He wants and promises that if "I will be the God of you, then you shall be My people."  Promises to restore us.  Give us new life.  To heal our wounds...to give us GRACE, even in the wilderness of our lives, even after surviving the sword.  

WHY?  Because He's loved us with an everlasting love.  70 years.  And then some.  EVER-LASTING.  

Loved me.  Loves Haiti.  Loves America.  Loves you.  Everlasting love.

As I wait and watch p-a-t-i-e-n-t-l-y for this to be fulfilled in Haiti, it is with Hope.  Because He knows the future, He has an everlasting love for each person on this planet, and because He can DO what No-One-No-Thing-No-Place else can do.  

Heal wounds.  Rebuild.  Make straight.  BE entirely Satisfying.

And I rejoice that there is no more waiting in my life, no more in-vain crying out about what to do with this problem of my life.  

Because He has been found by me (right before me the whole time)...just because I searched.  And every day, in the most free, most productive, most precious time I have to give, He is again.

Press on, weary friend, with hope.