more than the watchmen wait for the morning

Despite seeing the Lord at work so clearly on a daily basis, and the joy that we continue to experience while living alongside of our brothers and sisters here in Haiti, we have been simultaneously feeling discouraged, depressed and even a bit despairing.

We have been feeling the type of frustration and sadness that forces us to the Lord...we cannot come to Him later, cannot seek Him when we're 'finished', cannot wait until a better time. We need Him. NOW. Need to hear His voice, feel His hand, see His face. We praise the Lord for times such as these!

Not coincidentally, I am also studying overtime to prepare for a Bible study God's doing through me starting next week. In my desperation, He's had me clinging to the Scriptures I'm studying: the Psalms of Ascent, Psalm 120-134.

Something Matt has taught me is to "pray" Scripture...claim it as my own and put my name in there, my story, MY God.

And something God has done is continue to bring the Scriptures to life in a way they never were before coming to Haiti...praise the Lord for His faithfulness to speak to us where we are!

Today, this is what that looks like: (all taken from Psalms 120-134)

In my trouble I cried to the Lord,

and He answered me!

I will lift up my eyes to the mountains (outside my window)

From where shall my help come?

My help comes from You,

maker of heaven and earth.

You will not allow my foot to slip;

You who keep me will NOT slumber.

You are my keeper;

You are my shade (in the scorching sun overhead)

The sun will not smite you by day,

and You will protect me from all evil;

You will guard our going out (to class, to evangelize, to town) and our coming in,

from this time forth and forever.

Behold, as the eyes of the servants look to the hand of their master,

As the eyes of a maid to the hand of her mistress,

(As the eyes of the poor to the hand of the foreigner, hoping, relying, desperate for good things)

So MY eyes look to YOU.

Be gracious to me, O Lord, be gracious.

My soul is filled with the scoffing of those who are at ease.

Had it not been for YOU,

O Lord, had it not been for YOU on our side,

the waters (hardship, heartbreak, disappointment, devestations) would have engulfed us;

The raging waters would have swept over our souls.

But blessed be the Lord, who has not given us over!

The Lord has done great things for us;

We are GLAD.

Unless YOU Lord build this house,

we labor in vain as we build it;

Unless YOU Lord guard the city,

our watchmen keep awake in vain.

Out of the depts I have cried to You,

O Lord, Lord, hear my voice!

Let your ears be attentive to my voice.

If You, LORD, should mark iniquities,

O Lord, who could stand? (AMEN, not me!)

There is forgiveness with You! (Amen again)

My soul waits for the Lord

MORE than the watchmen wait for the morning;

(Our watchmen, they walk about our home all night long...how anxious they must be to see the sun, how glad, how joyful and relieved to feel its warmth after the long dark night!)

Indeed, more than the watchmen for the morning,

my soul waits for YOU.

O, Stacey, hope in the Lord;

For in Him there is lovingkindness.

I will not sleep,

Until I find a place for the Lord to dwell.

Waiting on Him with great anticipation...