breaking the agreement

A few days ago I was pushing Emma in the stroller and watching Ben and Nora on their bikes, and listened to a good word by John Eldridge on breaking agreements....something I didn't know I needed to hear. 

So maybe you're the same. 

He was not talking about not letting your yes be yes and your no be no, or those kinds of agreements. 

Instead, he spoke of agreements we make when we don't see any other possibility, words we speak and believe as true because we don't see any other way. 

Instead of giving you his examples, I'm going to be vulnerable and give you some of mine from this past season.

This is going to be stressful.

It is always going to feel like this.

I am never going to get to rest / grieve / have time for myself / get to travel. 

I am alone. 

I don't have what it takes. 

It is never going to be ok. 

My best years are over. 

I am never going to get to meet my grandkids. 

This is going to fail. 

I have too many kids to be able to ever do that / have that / experience that.

We are never going to be able to do something like that. 

Today is going to be rough. 

Do you have a list of things, maybe even small things that you said or thought just today, that came out of seeing no other possibility? That seemed obvious, or even like common-sense, but totally cut God out of the equation?

These are agreements that need to be broken--he suggested through my phone as I sweat it out with the kids--because they are closing God and His plans and ways entirely out of the conversation, and becoming the filter through which you approach all of life.  

MY truths. Not His. 

I have been living out of the "obvious wisdom" of my own perspective truths, instead of out of being inagreement with HIM and His ways and ability to make ways. 

The Biblical example that came to my mind as he spoke was of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, who should have been saying, "We are going to burn to death. But, we will be still be faithful" and instead said like crazy people: "Our God can make a way. But even if He doesn't, we will be faithful."

The personal example that came to mind was of those years after mom died. So many times did I face the "reality" of, "I will never have a mom. My kids won't have grandma in their lives. I will never have a woman who roots for me and invests in me and knows us well and cares, ever again." And yet the Lord has made ways again and again for moms in my life and grandmas in my kids lives, filling the gaps in impossible ways and providing in ways I could not have imagined. When I look for holes in my agreement, He shows me ALL the ways He has worked and is working on my behalf to provide the impossible.

Ask the Lord what agreements you are making, that already have you discouraged...or mad...or weary...or pitying...or giving up...or without hope...sometimes before the season, the vacation, the job has even started! 

Ask the Lord what agreements we are bringing into our days and trips and families and marriages and friendships and churches and jobs and futures, and if they are not HIS TRUTHS, break the agreement. 

Lord, I break the agreement that I can't _______________. That I won't _______________. That You won't or can't ___________________.

This isn't rocket science, I know you're telling me :) And you're right. 

I know this is just another version of trusting the Lord and identifying the places in my life that I am not, the places where I am relying on my own strength and understanding. But I need all the versions, all the refinements, all the "Lord, help my unbelief!s" that I can get. I'm being a lot more careful what I say, and questioning what I think is true against what He is saying is true... and turning to share the same thing with the little ones in my care and the men and women God puts me next to every day. 

What agreements are YOU making without making sure our God agrees?

I'd love you to share your thoughts on this with me...the agreements He's showing you that need broken...your experiences with this...  staceyhaiti@gmail.com