the slow work

We got in tonight from Tupelo, the birthplace of Elvis Presley, after a full weekend of the Replanted Conference.

There were so many relatable perspectives. I am a stories person...all those years in Haiti of having collecting and sharing stories be my main thing...and hearing from foster parents, foster kids, adoptive parents, orphans, biological kids whose families fostered, even a woman whose children were in foster care and now she is a foster parent for others...was powerful. 

Confessions, mistakes, fears, little victories and mountains of concerns struck me deeply with same here's,  and that alone was a gift. The fostering journey is a lot more layered than I ever imagined, and I know it was no mistake God had us at this training just one week before our big court date.  

If any of this speaks to you and where YOU are...

The more healthy adult relationships a child has--far more than therapy--the more likely he will be able to recover from trauma and thrive.  It's not all on us. It is THE reason we are stretching so wide to send our bonuses to a Christian school with Christian teachers and coaches, the reason why we spend every Tuesday night with a small group of families, every Friday night driving the girls all to youth group with five fantastic youth leads, every Sunday surrounding ourselves with church family. 

It is not my job to future-proof my kiddos.  Oh man. I am here to 1st Corinthians 13 love and protect and hope and trust and persevere on all seven of my kiddos for TODAY, not to feel the weight of planning for, reteaching and guarding their eternal lives, or to make sure that they end up here or there or this way or that. I am responsible to guard and water the deposits entrusted to me for today, and let Him future. 

I'm not the savior or the source. I'm a puzzle piece.  I am just a part in all these stories...they have a Savior and they have a Hero, the same one I do.

We learned more about helping our kiddos learn resilience, how to support, how to self regulate, how to teach mindfulness, how to correct more expectations and help kids affected by trauma to do the same.

As long as there is breath, there is hope...a powerful reminder I still need for my brother, and for some of the characters in our kiddos' stories....cycles that seem unbreakable and despairing.

Finally, Trust in the slow work of God. 

I've heard that one before. I know it, I do. 

But it hit me hard at the very end this weekend, beautiful and heartbreaking testimonies that have taken decades to redeem and many not yet there. 

All my pages and pages of notes, and it boils down to listening and loving with grace and patience and mercy coming from HIM...and trusting in His slow work in the lives of these little ones, all.  Trusting in the slow work of God in my own heart and life and marriage and story. 

I may not have ever gone looking for this fostering journey (and I was surprised this weekend how many people share this story!) but as our thoughtful girlie apologized tonight that we "had to spend the weekend in mandatory training because of me," I was able to honestly honestly say, "NO sorries. You are SO worth it, and He is teaching me SO much...and that is always good. Thank you."

Whatever our burdens tonight...what is He teaching you on the always costly journey of following Him?