His third way

One morning this week, while the house was still dark and cold and the dear ones were all still sleeping, I looked at the stack of devotionals and Bibles on my desk unopened, and didn't know where to start. I asked the Lord to tell me. 

Lord, I don't know how to do this differently, but I can't keep doing it like I've been. I need you to tell me, like, real specifically, how to handle this painful, complicated situation. Not just be here with me in it.  I need you to SPEAK. I can't handle it anymore. Also can't see any way out of it. So you gotta tell me some third way...and whatever it IS, I'll DO IT.

Ever been there? 

My brain was so blurry and tired in the middle of a too-much week. But the situation I was abandoning to him has been months. Years. At my breaking point. 

I wasn't being in awe or respectful or meek, Lord forgive me. 

But I was being fully abandoned. Fully needing. And fully looking to Him. 

And in the middle of a week of friends surgeries, blueberry cobbler for 70, hosting small group, teenage drama, homeschool, church events, serving in kids ministry, some hard conversations, two days of zoom meetings with the One Mission Society board I am so incredibly honored to serve on, some hard things to carry with Matt...He met me. 

His third way. 

With power and clarity and peace. 

His third way...that way we NEVER see until He shows us...and then it is Absolutely The Solution....that third way that changes our HEARTS, not necessarily our situation..He showed me. 

First, in the designated devotion for exactly that day. Said exactly what I needed to hear as if the author, long dead, knew exactly my situation. Then, in my Bible reading exactly for that day, again, through an author long dead, as if he saw, in verses I've read before, but never like this. And then, through a routine board training I expected to simply "get through", that sliced RIGHT to the heart of the thing and spoke loud and bold and free. 

What I am experiencing, JESUS experienced FIRST.

What has been painful for me, was DEATH for Him. What I have known, He knew far sharper, far better, exactly understands. 

My first peace almost always comes from the realization that the Almighty God understands SO completely and Jesus has lived it SO fully, that I am hemmed in, understood and loved better than I could ever understand..and boldness and courage and comfort and joy meets me there.

My second peace came from His truth. His truth--the one I know but have been overlooking in this situation because I've been clinging to my experience--is truth that CHANGES the hearer. By Jesus and His grace, we ARE equipped to be His witnesses where.stinking.ever we are. WhatEVER situation we are in. WhatEVER difficulty we are facing.  We. Are. Equipped and Accompanied for it. To overcome it. Equipped to look like Him, speak like Him, respond like Him.  What we NEED we HAVE in Him. 

His Word, His Truth, makes what feels like our truth and experience fall to the ground.

That thing you can't carry...bring Him. He's got a third way, and His burden truly is light.