in His hands

Well, we must admit...in all the scenarios we played out in our minds the past 41 weeks about this time home, dates, Lily...we were NEVER 41 weeks pregnant! We never imagined she wouldn't be here by Christmas, much less by New Years, which just continues to show us that we've never been in control of this, after all. Nonetheless, His face, not hers, has truly been our satisfaction each morning when we wake, and for that we are unwaveringly grateful (Psalm 17:15).

Haiti has been strong on our minds and hearts the past few days...We are content knowing that the Lord is working there each day, with or without us, and that He continues to hold this dear country and the people that have become so precious to us in His hands. We continue to hold strong to the knowledge that Haiti does NOT belong to Satan, as many believe, and that it's people do NOT belong in darkness...it is HIS, as it always has been, and all He holds for His people is abundant light and the same freedom He has offered me. Despite all of Haiti's problems and struggles, the first prayers that come to our lips when thoughts of it cross our minds are praises.
According to the doctor yesterday, we may just be waiting to be induced January 2nd for Lily. She doesn't seem to be showing any inclination towards coming before she is forced to :) We are working now to get flights set up back into Haiti a few weeks after...later than we had hoped, but giving her some time to get strong and to get her birth certificate, social security number and passport.

We're planning to head to Pennsylvania January 9th to see Lori, my aunts, uncle and grandparents, and then on to Delaware January 10th, where we'll spend two weeks with Matt's side of the family, all in Delaware and New Jersey. We'll then be back to Ohio for a few days for doctor's appointments and immunizations and finalized paper work, and then we'll head for Florida, driving this time to avoid as much air travel as possible for a brand new baby (and so we can stock up on diapers!) This is all based on her being our New Year's baby, so we'll just see what happens!

Meanwhile, we're continuing to enjoy just some really good time with my family and visiting friends and family. We've gotten to do SO many of the things we had hoped to...eaten wonderful food, seen a few movies, passed hours playing family Speed Scrabble, read some amazing books, been to Wal-Mart, Barnes & Noble, Starbucks and mostly, just passed some really fun and meaningful time with a lot of different people. Each day has been such a gift, and we still have so much good time with family in front of us.

"Oh, that my soul may sing praise to You and NOT be silent..." Psalm 30:12

Merry Christmas!

We had a wonderful Christmas yesterday, being with and talking to family and enjoying a nice quiet day at home. Around noon I started feeling sick and now half our family has serious colds, but other than that all is well! Today is Lily's due date, but still no signs of her coming (except that I look like a big Christmas ornament :) We hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and continues to enjoy today and this weekend with family!

weekend and waiting...

Life goes on as we wait for little Lily to join us! The house is decorated, along with the tree, and my sister is finally home from Chicago, where she teaches 5th grade in the inner city. It is wonderful to have my best friend home, though Aunt Lisa is becoming just as impatient with days passing without her niece as I am!

This past Saturday night we all went to our favorite restaurant for dinner and then to the "Living Christmas Trees" play at Grace Brethren Church...it was a HUGE production, complete with live camels, snakes and sheep, dancing, music, acting...and it played out the story of our Saviors birth and death and the "reason for the season." It was awesome, and such a powerful reminder of the amazing history we have a Christians. "Seeing" Jesus grow from an adorable little baby into that battered man on the cross gave us both such an overwhelming reminder that He did that JUST FOR ME...

Tomorrow is my last doctor's appointment...still no signs of labor! We'll let you know!

Proverbs 21:1..."The king's heart is like streams of water in the hand of the Lord; He turns it wherever He wishes." We keep praying that the Lord will use this time out of Haiti to continue to stretch and teach us...and that our hearts would be so moldable!

the Nutcracker

For Christmas, Matt and I always try to get each other something to DO instead of a gift, and last night was my present! Matt got tickets for us and my dad to go see "The Nutcracker" ballet in downtown Columbus, preceded by a really nice dinner at one of my favorite places. It was SO much fun, something we definitely could not have done if we'd been in Haiti or if we had a new baby, and just so special! It brought back some great memories of doing this with my whole family whenever I was younger, and was super "Christmasy"! My sister will be home from Chicago for 2 weeks tomorrow, and we're praying for Lily to come this weekend so we can have the most time with Lily as possible to share with her, the rest of my family, and Matt's family in Delaware!

Our good friends from college left this morning, leaving us with a great weekend of memories! Maria and Elisa were both in our wedding, came and visited us whenever we lived in Kentucky and Ohio and whenever we studied French in Canada, and have been all around good and faithful friends! We ate a lot of good food, visited a huge lights display, watched some classic Christmas movies, did a little Christmas shopping, and enjoyed being friends in the same place...it doesn't happen often! They live in Georgia, and we'll make a stop through there with Lily on our way back to Haiti, Lord willing!



Matt finishes his first semester with Wesley Biblical Seminary at midnight this Thursday, so he is working overtime trying to get final projects and papers done! As soon as he finishes with that Thursday, he still has quite a bit of work to do to continue equipping his substitute in Haiti to teach in January until we can get back. I am getting in a good mix of rest and work...laundry, cleaning, Christmas cards, marketing, sewing and getting the house ready for several people coming home/coming through for Christmas. Just waiting!

"It's the time of year when people are thinking about Jesus."

she told Matt Tuesday morning before handing him a book, "The Greatest Man Who Ever Lived." Up until Matt shut the door, listening from the other room, I thought perhaps my "Jehovah's Witness" assumption was incorrect. Maybe a local church was just encouraging it's congregants to go to people's homes and tell them openly about Jesus, using Christmas as the bridge. (If that HAD been the case, we'd be at THAT church this Sunday!)

However, two minutes with the material she left after promising to return soon to discuss it (she has no idea what she's gotten herself into...Matt lives for conversations like this :) made it obvious the Jesus she is "thinking about" isn't the same one who has transformed our lives and who is THE hope of the world this Christmas...this moment.

We couldn't help but feel a little discouraged, not just because no Christian has EVER come to the door wanting to tell us about the Bible or about Jesus or about how He is the Lord of their lives, but also because the combatting message that we DID hear at church this past Sunday was that, like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, there is a place for all of us "misfits."

Life isn't just dire in Haiti. Being back in the States for the past few weeks now has reminded me how desperate the situation is here, too...how hungry the world (parts fully realizing, and other parts ignorant to the fact) is for Jesus, for truth, for change.

Reading through the story of Jesus coming into the world this past week from the Luke account, I want that...that HOLINESS, that AWE, that TRUTH and that simplicity of who Jesus is.

"Praise the Lord! He has sent us a MIGHTY Savior
JUST as He promised long ago
NOW we will be saved!
He has been merciful by remembering his sacred covenant
We have been rescued from our enemies
so that we can SERVE God WITHOUT fear,
in HOLINESS and RIGHTEOUSNESS for as long as we live!

And you, my little son (speaking of John the Baptist)
will be called the prophet of the Most High,
because you will prepare the way for the Lord
You will tell His people HOW TO FIND SALVATION
through FORGIVENESS of their sins.
Because of Gods tender MERCY,
the morning light from heaven is about to break upon us,
to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death,
and to guide us to the path of peace." Luke 1:68-79

Um, WOW.

There it is: WHO our God is...a God who VISITS us, REDEEMS us, sends us a Savior, and is faithful to His promises

WHAT our lives should look like...Serving God without fear, being holy and righteous for as long as we live

and WHAT we should be doing...telling people how to find His Salvation..guiding HIS people who sit in darkness towards this AWESOME, unfaltering and unable-to-be-substituted-by-ANYTHING-else Light...cannot-be-counterfeited, purchased or fabricated Path of Peace.

Man. Let's give THAT this Christmas. You can't GET THAT from other religions and cults, can't GET THAT from Rudolph or even from most churches we've been in, can't GET THAT from good time with family, from a new baby, a great vacation, time off of work or great Christmas traditions. That's why He's the MESSIAH. the SAVIOR. Because there is nothing else worth having...no other Light for this Darkness.

I HOPE it's that time of year when people are thinking about Jesus. Let's give it to them...

O come, O come Emmanuel...God with us!

O Christmas Tree

Matt is safely home from a great trip to Kentucky! He had a wonderful time visiting old friends, co-workers professors and meeting with a few people for his Master's. He even was able to spend an hour with a new friend: a Haitian high school student who was THRILLED to talk to someone in his own tongue from his own country. Our dreams to retire one day, when we're like, 90, in Kentucky continue...

He got home late Saturday night, and Sunday after church Lily took part in her first "White Family Christmas Tradition"...hunting for that perfect Christmas tree. Being in Haiti last year for Christmas made this even more fun! It was hard to believe we were in Haiti just days ago as we trudged through the snow searching for a pine tree. We had such a good time, Lily and I got some exercise, and now we have a ridiculously HUGE tree in our living room!...it smells SO good!


Our weekly doctor's appointment today showed everything to be going well, and we also checked out the hospital and figured out where to go...now, it's just the WHEN...

...quite the change in scenery!...

Tomorrow is the last day of class at Emmaus Biblical Seminary before Christmas break! We're so thankful for friends and family here, there and everywhere, and for the ways that God is continuing to work in our lives and speak peace, a desire to know Him more, and joy into our day-to-day. Hope you're all enjoying some beautiful family Christmas traditions, snow or not!

Greek, Hebrew, Creole...

We're realizing that life is just busy wherever you are! Matt is working full-time on Greek for his Masters, Hebrew for his substitute until we can get back in January, and working on several "final projects" for this semester at Wesley Biblical Seminary, which doesn't actually finish until December 19th. He's also preparing to head for Kentucky tomorrow for a meeting with his master's advisor and to celebrate the upcoming marriage (December 29th) of one of our best friends from college. He'll be gone until Saturday night or Sunday.

Meanwhile, I am translating student testimonies from Creole into English to put our new first year students into OMS's student sponsorship program, working on getting our Christmas newsletter out, and setting up several churches in the States for Christmas and New Year's programs that want to involve Emmaus Biblical Seminary.

We both have already individually begun to miss Haiti however! Not the heat or the roads so much, but we are truly missing the people, missing living in a community where you know someone everywhere you go, and miss the loving and relationship-focused nature of the Haitian people. There are three more school days until Christmas break for our students, and tonight is their big Christmas party (pictured here, last years). We miss everyone!
If you haven't already, check out the baby blog for photos of this weekends baby shower! ayarsbaby.blogspot.com

Thank you for your continued prayers as we live between two worlds waiting for another addition!